I am typing in the midst of a mess. Piles of paper, empty jewel cases (the cd kind), a dvd spindle, about 148000 old business cards belonging to Mister Bear from his former job.
There's stuff on the floor, on the desk, on the window sill.
There's boxes of scrapping stuff not yet unpacked from the Girls Night In two weeks ago.
The dining room is not much better. We haven't done any dining in there for quite a while.
The sofa bed is piled with sheets and towels that have to be inspected before they can be folded and put away. Chickabid had a huge play in the flooded poo pit last week (don't ask. please, if you love me, don't ask) and some of the stuff on the line got fouled. I am trying to screw up the courage to deal with it, but no success yet.
The lounge room is passable...so long as you ignore the filthy carpet overdue for a steam clean. The bedrooms- over them we shall draw a veil.
The toy room is fine so long as the door stays shut.
I am a child of the King, but my life is so screwed and flawed how can His light possibly shine out. I'm at the end of my ability to cope. I'm writing over here about what's really going on, and where I think we're headed and why. I am torn between this life which is commanding so much time and effort, and the life which is to come. I guess the biggest encouragement is seeing for the first time that the "great ones" of the Bible weren't really all that great after all. They were fallible, frail human beings just like me. They made mistakes - huge ones some of them...Peter and Moses immediately spring to mind - but they didn't trust in themselves. They put their trust in God. They didn't try to be more than they were. They certainly didn't hold themselves up as spiritual models "Look at how fabulously spiritual I am", rather they looked to Jesus - the author and finisher of their faith. Now, going back and looking at their words and actions we can clearly see the light shining through. But they themselves were oblivious to the light and were only aware of their shortcomings and how far short they fell.
My personal inclination is to throw in the towel and give up. To stop even trying for that perfection, cos brother, it ain't gonna happen. But then, some encouragement from Philippians. We're studying Philippians on Tuesday nights at home group and this verse jumped out. It's from Philippians chapter 1 and verse 6"...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
I don't get to throw in the towel. There is still work for me to do.
I'll be honest. I am frightened. I am frightened not about the end, for I know that is secure. I am frightened about what lies between now and the end. The Unknown. At this time in history we're a mirror of Noah's time. Noah knew that time was running out and he knew that he had a God appointed job to do. Then, as now, there were those who mocked and scoffed and chose not to believe. Noah had the strength and the courage to keep going in spite of the unbelief around him. He chose to put his faith in God. The rest of the people considered him a bit of a loony. That was until the first raindrops fell. Then they were forced to believe, but it was too late.
There will be more about this line of thinking at the climate change blog, but for the moment I'll say this.
We are nearing the end. To continue the Noah metaphor, the storm clouds are gathering. Opinion varies as to what they mean. Some think it will pass over. Some think that the clouds are empty. Some refuse to see the clouds at all. Some blame the clouds on God, or on his people. George W is probably blamed for the clouds in some quarters.
Oh, yes. The storm clouds are there and when they break, all hell will also break loose. Pun completely and utterly intended. But on those same clouds will come the Saviour, ready to gather His own. The clouds that brought destruction to the world in Noah's day meant salvation to those resting in the safety of the ark. It's worth thinking about and pondering on.
And while we wait, I have some housework to do ;)
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